Saturday, July 11, 2009

The Rock and the Battering Wave

Sometimes there are things we have to deal with that just go on and on. Several people I love dearly and am at least fairly close to are going through a lot right now. People go through things all of the time, so really, it is no big deal. What strikes me is, everyone I know right now who is going through something is dealing with something they have been battling for, not years, but decades.

My heart is to help. When I look at it, I stand back in amazement and try not to judge. These things that have been going on for decades are the same behavior patterns over and over and over again. When I first heard that phrase "The definition of insanity is to do the same thing over and over again and expect different results", it really hit home. And that is what I see all around...a "weakness" for lack of a better word that keeps people doing the same thing over and over.

Then I begin to wonder how CAN I help? Can you help people who don't want a solution? Can you help even when you don't see any type of results at all? Reminds me a little of praying and seeing no results. You could pray for something for what seems like forever and not see any results. Does that mean you should not keep praying? I look around and just sigh and all of the repeated behaviors and think, maybe I SHOULD just give up trying to help in any way.

Sensing my frustration today, a dear friend led me to 1 Corinthians 15:58, "Therefore my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain." My application study bible explains this by saying, "Paul says that because of the resurrection, nothing we do is in vain. Sometimes we hesitate to do good because we don't see any results. But if we can maintain a heavenly perspective, we will understand that often we will not see the good that results from our efforts. If we truly believe that Christ has won the ultimate victory, that fact MUST affect the way we live right now. Don't let discouragement over an apparent lack of results keep you from working. Do the good that you have opportunity to do, knowing that your work will have eternal results."

Before I read this, my sense was to feel smothered by people who needed help, even though they were not asking for my help. To be tough and pick them up by their ears and shake them and say, "WAKE UP ALREADY!!! Why are you allowing Satan into your life to fill your head with such garbage after all these decades???" (Just so happens I am dealing with amazingly eerily situations between certain people right at this moment.) There is a line in one of my favorite movies "Legends of the Fall" that says, "Tristan was the rock that people crashed themselves against." And that is how I was starting to feel. I am not doing a very good job of explaining, lest this be taken as my saying I do not like to be there for people. It isn't that, because I DO love to be there for anyone and everyone. It is just that, after a while, if you are that rock, you really start to wear down from all the crashing waves after a while. That being said, I look back at all the "rocks" I have had in my life. People who were there to listen to me and pray for me over and over again. Wow! Talk about grateful!

Then you read something like 1 Corinthians 15:58 and you know that if, at this point in time in your life, you are blessed enough to be the rock, you have a little something in common with Jesus and you can't give up, because people could use your help, even if it seems like they do not hear you when you speak.

If anyone is out there reading, I want to challenge you this very day to be someones rock. Whether it be listening to someone with a problem, helping someone who is clearly in need, or my favorite, putting someones own emotional needs ahead of whatever it is we would like to do for ourselves. Is it possible to spend one entire day thinking of how our actions are affecting the lives of people around us? And if we do try that, are we putting others first, or always out for the quick, selfish fix that will make us happy? An example of this happened to me today..while talking to two "friends" about how to help a mutual acquaintance of ours. These two "friends" say they are Christians. When I proposed that we make a sacrifice to better serve our mutual friend, they said, "Oh no, we can't do that." Whether you believe in God or not, you truly do reap what you sow in this world and I, for one, would rather reap a garden of putting other people first and helping, then making sure my own needs are met, especially when they are frivilous.

We won't get to Heaven by the good work we do here on this Earth, but maybe, just maybe, if we don't give up on the people around us, even when their behavior patterns seem so insane you can't even fathom and it seems like all of your praying and all of your actions mean nothing...just maybe we can all learn from one another how to spend more time being rocks (hopefully without feeling battered) and less time being the waves doing the battering.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

very encouraging =)

Tammy said...

Awesome and so perfectly on time. Thanks for being sensitive to the leading of the Lord! Love you!

Unknown said...

Nicely put Missy. Praise the Lord for the mighty work He is doing in and through you.

Melissa Lampert said...

Thanks Tammy.....Thanks Laurie, isn't it nice to know that when you plop an awesome scripture in front of me, I actually do something with it:) You helped me through that day! (ie, you sure know how to be a good rock:)

Chris W. said...

Very well said!!!

I read somewhere that Love is the only thing that we really have to give, and so we must give it freely. I can't remember where I heard this, but it has always stuck with me. And what's more is that it makes perfect sense to me. It seems that the only real satisfaction in this world comes from giving rather than denying love. And while a great many people would rather focus on the "symptoms" of insanity, or weakness, and sometimes the results themselves as the "problem", you get to the heart of the matter here. The wonderful thing about being the Rock is that we have an endless capacity for kindness and love, and it is only when we deny this Gift to others that we become like so many waves - broken, only to be swallowed back into the sea, lost. But it is the Rock that will stand above the sea forever. Change must begin within, and this being so there is only so much a friend can do. But though you may not be able to make someone accept your love or your help, it costs nothing to continue to give it when you are in a position to do so. And by doing so you will remain strong enough for others that may be willing to accept your help. In the end, we all will surely be a Wave at one point or another. After all, you don't get extra credit by doing everything yourself without help. But I agree that it should always be our goal to be the Rock as often as we can!

Melissa Lampert said...

Very true cousin..as my friends will tell you, have been the wave many, MANY times..luckily I think I may be getting a little better with my Rock skills as I age:)